Only a blind man could not be inspired by a moment like this. Right now I am sitting on the shore of Gold Cord Lake. The water is in front of me and the mountains surround me. I made it to the top a while ago and have since been mostly alone, just me and the dogs. When an hour passed and there were no people I swam in the freezing, clear water...an endeavor that which, if ever repeated will be followed by post swim bug dope bath.
I am feeling with every sense. The silence echoes the sound of cars on the long road in the valley but since I have spent the last two hours chasing the sunshine around the lake there are almost none. I close my eyes against the sky and listen. The spirit of the earth speaks in rushing streams, breathing dogs, and rock chuck chirps. Every so often I even here the eerie siren of an eagle. I am trying to take it all in and I smile at nothing in particular. I run my bare feet across the moss covered rock where I sit. I breathe the mountain air every few minutes I catch the scent of wet dogs as they dart back and forth, so happy to be in a state of total freedom.
My mind feels free.
There is no one needing me right now. No phone ringing. No email to answer. Just me. By myself in a place where no one is asking. Where I don't have to tell. And most of all there is no one judging me on my choices or my hair or my weight. I am exactly who I am. I know it has to end. I can't stay here all night and Bailey seems to think it is time to go. She is bouncing back and forth between the trail and the rocks. There is now no sun touching the lake and the shade is beginning to shroud the shore as well. I decide she is probably right. Balto has grown bored and is sticking his head in a marmot hole.
The trip down is quiet. There is a park ranger in the visitors lot but that is all. I am in no hurry to get back to civilization so I walk slowly thinking about my life. Feeling the peace that comes from within. Feeling moved. By the time I reached my house I was feeling sad that I had no one to share the evening with. That it was just me and suddenly I felt reassured that it would not always be so. I need to appreciate this season because it won't always be that I have an evening where the only responsibility I have is one to myself.
It is good to enjoy the company you keep when you are alone. But it is also okay to feel lonely. Because if I wasn't lonely right now I would never have known that I wasn't supposed to share this moment with anyone because God was sharing it with me.
