Weighty Wednesday: Episode 2

Week one:

I went to the gym everyday except Friday and Saturday: Check
I went to bed 30 minutes earlier: Check
Sit up straight: I am working on this. I have a note on my computer screen that says "SIT UP!" to remind me and I am finding that it is a helpful reminder for whenever I find myself slouching.

I am actually pretty proud of myself.

It is my plan to add new goals to the above original 3 each week. This weeks goals are:
-Lose 6 pounds.
-Drink 100 oz of water a day.
-Stop drinking soda *even diet*.

15 weeks until I am 25. Here is two the second week of preparation for the second half of my twenties (and beyond..Buzz Lightyear style :o))

Sara

Unprincipled. And ridiculous.

I am a total drama queen. I am aware of this about myself. But I really do my best to never hurt someone with something I say. I love to write and I have seen the effect that words can have on the world. They are powerful. What you say and how you say it can make or break a friendship, a romance, or a strangers day.

So why oh why would someone lie? Why would someone be so jealous, unhappy, and vindictive that they would treat someone they love with hatred or disrespect either directly or indirectly? How jaded, selfish, and unkind must a person be to lie about the actions of one person in order to obtain a desired outcome?

Oh. But I suppose I shouldn't ask why. I should ask what. What should I do about people that are so mind boggling-ly, outrageously selfish that I want to beat my head against the wall just for a moment's respite? Nothing. Absolutely nothing except to acknowledge the fact that some people will never see that the world does not revolve around them. Will never see that it hurts people to be lied about. That it hurts people when they create unnecessary and unscrupulous drama. And if your entertainment comes from hurting someone else you are not being a good person.

Life should rarely be about doing what makes you happy. Life is about doing what is right even if it doesn't make you particularly "happy" at the time. Happiness is a mostly elusive emotion. Real happiness comes from having a joyful spirit no matter the circumstance.

Have a blessed day!

Sara

Weighty Wednesday-Episode 1

I am not sure if I am quite ready to be totally honest about my number on the scale. What I am ready to do (I hope, really) is to do something about it. I don't want it to define me anymore. And I won't. I have been wanting an accountability partner for weight loss and was not sure who to ask. But I thought wow. I have a blog with a modest audience. I am sure that they won't mind if I broadcast my weight woes to them.

Every week I am going to weigh in and tell you how much weight I have lost. And every week I am going to make a to-do list of things I want to do to improve my life, health, and sanity.

So this weeks goals are:

-Sit up straight
-Go to the gym every day
-Go to bed 30 minutes earlier

I have 16 weeks until I turn 25.

Ready. Set. Go.

I will wait.

I have dated a lot of men. Not in a whispered "I hear she has dated a lot of men" way. No, in a I have gone on several dates with men where nothing happened and if I am being honest some where they did. These relationships have not been fulfilling. They have left me mostly sad and always empty. I can't say that I regret them; regret seems a worthless emotion. I don't regret the relationships. I regret that I never felt good enough about myself to expect better; to wait.

To say "no I am guarding my heart for my husband and you're not him."

Does that sound trite to you? If so, the rest of this post may not be your cup of tea. Anyway, I saw this video one day that Jefferson Bethke made called "Sexual Healing".

There aren't words for how this affected my heart. Immediately. I said I would listen to that voice. I would not ask why, I would ask what. What to do. And you know what answer I got? Wait. God has always wanted me to wait. And really the definition of insanity is repeating the same action and expecting different results. So I am going to change how I do things and when God brings the man I am to be with into my life it will be different. Because we will have a friendship and a relationship with Jesus as the foundation.

That is how it was really meant to be after all.

Sara.



PS
I found this on post secret a week or so ago and thought it applied :o)

Looking for love (in all the wrong places?)

I have done a thorough study on the merits of the Craigslist junkyard and come up with a few simple rules to help those who are looking for love in all the wrong places. The same situation just different faces...what was I doing? Oh right. List. Okay, here goes:

1. If the post says, "I am married" in it; don't respond.
2. If the post says, "recently divorced" in it; don't respond.
3. If the post names any part of the female anatomy; don't respond.
4. If the post names any part of the male anatomy; don't respond.
5. If the post has a misspelled word in the title; don't respond.
6. If the post uses so many acronyms that your next tab is open to urbandictionary.com; don't respond.
7. If the post makes any reference to doing something to you; don't respond.
8. If the post says anything followed or preceded by the words, "I guess"; don't respond.
9. If the post is or contains a poem of any kind written by the posting author or any author for that matter; don't respond.
10. If the post contains words abbreviated by letters (ex. r for are); don't respond.
11. If the post depicts any unclothed part of the human body normally clothed with the exception of a particular beach or weird art class; don't respond.

Following these stipulations will basically eliminate any need for the use of the CL personal section. Now if you find a post that exceeds expectation RESPOND IMMEDIATELY. He is either lying or your soul mate!

Seriously though; I can scarcely believe the things I read. Someone posted the other day looking for "Risque Cleaning". What even IS that!? And he said he would compensate the responder for their efforts. I wonder if it was the police departments attempt at a sting of some kind because cleaning in lingerie sounds like the least sexy thing ever. I don't know about you but when I clean my house by the end I am sweaty, I have bleach stained my shirt, I have dishwater running down my front and I smell like a chemical lab. I suppose if it was light cleaning in lingerie that it might be okay but the poster did not specify the duration or intensity of the cleaning project he would be compensating for. I hope he pays in Trident Layers! Goody! But I digress.

I haven't done a CL "addition" in a while but thought that on Valentine's Day it would be appropriate to share where not to find love. :o)

Have a wonderful day,

Sara!

A quiet voice that speaks loudly.

I know I have been seriously slacking on my bloggage. I have been having a thought infestation problem and every time I try to write the words don't come out right. And I scrap it and my ADD moves me on to something else.

I have been feeling trepedatious at best and having an impossible time trying to figure out why. Why. What a question; one of the first we ask and the only one we will never answer. Why. So much power in those 3 letters. Why is infuriating and freeing. Why is binding and amazing.

And then in a quiet moment you hear it. Not in a Moses-ey, burning bush, 10 commandment way. Not in a thundery, Zeusy way. In a feeling deep in your heart. You know what it is you are meant to do. It's not an answer to why; in fact it begs the question itself. A feeling more than a voice, a warning, or a command. Like if your body just moves in the called direction you will never regret it.

Don't. Stay. Go. Act.

And if we were more honest when we say "I don't know." we would actually say, "I know but I am not ready to listen." If we were more honest we could say that before every big mistake we smothered conscience with a buffalo sized pillow and told ourselves that it would all be okay. Everything works out in the end. And it does usually. And changed we walk our path wondering who we would be if we hadn't made that exact decision that we were "told" not to.

But mistakes can be so sweet and if I hadn't made these ones I'd have made others. But I am scared. I am scared I will never find my Jerry because we have scarred ourselves into not being right for each other. Our choices have moved us so far apart that we can never find each other.

And then I hear that stirring in my heart; that if I would just do the things I know I should then everything would fall into place.

Instead of asking why I am going to start asking WHAT. "What" I can do something about; why just sends me into an angry hate spiral.

Ask what, not why. And then listen. That is my one month late resolution.